Lack of sleep and revelations

My neighbors guests woke me at 2am when they were leaving and I can't get back to sleep.

When I woke Friday morning the entire right side of face for throbbing, even my teeth hurt. So, no school and lots of naps for Mom. I still don't feel great.

I started thinking, since I couldn't get back to sleep. Unfortunately, it is something that happens to me often. Our first year in this house was a good one. We had no neighbors in the only house near us. The quiet was a great change from where we were before. But there was something more. In the spring after we moved in, I ran into Melissa at the pet store. Melissa and I met at TKD when her oldest was still taking the class. We bump into each other every now and then and catch up on things. Well, that day at the pet store she found out we had moved. She told me she was going to drive a bus in Kershaw. Low and behold she was driving the bus for our neighborhood. The following year the girls had so much fun waving to Mrs. Melissa as she would go back up the hill. Occasionally, we'd see her boys on the bus too. It was like a friend visiting every day. While it was only a wave, it was so much more. Our past was still part of our present.

Last summer I found out Melissa was getting a new route. I told her I was happy for her (she had trouble with some of her kids), but sad for us because we would no longer see her on a daily basis. Now, as I hear the roaring of the bus engine coming down the hill I watch the big yellow blur go by. Not looking at the driver and waving but understanding we no longer have a friend there. I think that is part of my loneliness these days. And not having a homeschool group to do activities with right now doesn't help. I know the girls would love to have more people to play with.

I think the one thing that I don't talk about much is the isolation of homeschooling. Please understand that does not mean we never leave the house or socialize. What it does mean is more times than not we are working very hard on our studies at home. We do take field trips. And the library is our second home (all the librarians know the girls and me by name). Of course we cannot forget TKD where there are lots of girls for them to socialize with. We used to have park day every Friday, then as usual Drama happens. I really don't know exactly what happened. People just stopped coming, so I stopped driving (it was quite a ways from the new house). We had started again last spring, then the heat of summer stopped us in our path. The path has not been picked up again. I miss afternoons with the ladies talking about...well, anything really. I miss seeing all the children and hearing about what they are learning and how they are being taught. I miss the camaraderie that used to exist in our group. Now there is no group. Some no longer homeschool. Some have moved. Some have changed their schedules to different days for the park. Others have joined co-ops and are just too busy. There is an answer. I just have not found it yet.